"Now they’re black and blue balls"
reason to not become an adult
- you can’t use the ‘my mum said i can’t go’ excuse to blow someone off
my mum has invited me over for dinner
my mum needs help with furniture
my mum just got a new phone and needs my help
my mum spoke to me from the grave and told me u need to stop inviting me out
Emmy award for Stana Katic in Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series
OH HEY AND THIS KID
songs that have an amazingly catchy and cool tune but really uncomfortable lyrics
I think we’re all thinking of the same thing but don’t dare speak its name for fear of summoning it.
We don’t talk about it
I will not ask you for forgiveness. What I have done is unforgivable. I was so lost in hatred and revenge. I never dreamed that I could love you so much. You stole what was left of my heart. And now I’ve lost you forever.
Okay everyone. Do you see this?
Do you see these two words?
They do not mean the same thing.
Can we all decide to stop using “gay” as a synonym for bisexual, since they’re completely different things? Bisexuality is not the same concept as homosexuality, nor is it a subset of it.
That aside I’m all for bi Spiderman
This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.
CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:
- do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
- go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
- if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
- look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
- the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
- works every time
"sad little bug" is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING
are you ever just like so upset by one thing you end up shaky and nauseous and like ??? excuse me situation but you are upsetting my chill and uncaring aesthetic